The last couple of weeks I've been on a high and it reached a level of hypomania. I became uncharacteristically louder in my speech, a bit psyched up and overly enthused and said a few inappropriate things. I also became a little boy crazed and was rather vocal about it. My therapist said I should just enjoy the ride but my psychologist has upped my meds and said I should have told her sooner. I had a rather complicated dream whereby I was involved in a sex experiment for science and it involved a friend of mine. In hindsight I should not have told my friend about it but I thought it funny at the time. When Freshlyground were unable to enter Zimbabwe for HIFA on the grounds of their "Chicken to Change" video, I became caught up in the hype and drama of it all.
When I get into this mode I worry about what will happen next and how far I will go. I am aware some of the things I say are inappropriate or insensitive but at times I can't stop myself. I start not sleeping properly and my mind just won't switch off. I also begin to think a little too highly of myself and feel invincible. I do wonder when I get off the high what sort of low is going to follow.
After giving up on the exotic Canadian-Iranian as a love interest - yes, I became rather enraptured by a visiting guitarist and my infatuation went to the extent that I attended his guitar workshop even though I have never played the guitar in my life, I set my sights on a local person. I have since realized though that it probably is a good thing it is likely to never become much. I went on a false hope to a music festival last weekend and on viewing them in that intoxicating environment decided perhaps not. Harare does not have that many eligible bachelors at hand. Oh well, perhaps it's just as well in my current euphoria.
