My Dad has bipolar but to date refuses to get it treated. I can remember his mood swings and found them difficult to handle. He could become violent and very angry as well as super critical. His unpredictable plunges into mania or depression scared me.
My Step-mother who is now divorced from my Dad and my Half-sister had reconnected with my Dad last year after many years. They thought he was a changed man and encouraged me to try make contact. My Step-mum had said my Dad was too proud and I would need to make the first move. I was hesitant, my Dad's erratic behaviour and instability still haunting me. I did consider emailing but I just wasn't sure if I was strong enough for the possible repercussions of making contact after almost 20 years. I got an email from my Step-mum this weekend saying that my Half-sister had told my Dad she was getting married. He reacted really badly though when he realised he was not invited. I don't know that I would want him at my wedding - you would just not know what he might do or say. It is sad but he pushed us all away and he needs help.
With my friend who is also bipolar having just had a baby it has made me think about if I ever have children. I would have to come off lithium as you can't be on lithium when you're pregnant. You also cannot breastfeed if you are on medication for depression which is a pity as it is what I would do if I was able to. My friend is also having to manage sleep as if you alter your sleep cycles it can trigger manic episodes or depression. The other big thing is that bipolar depression is hereditary so you risk passing it on to your child. After one has gone through it, it makes you think about inflicting it on to your child. There is treatment but it is still a hard road. My Dad definitely passed it on to me.
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