Possibilities and reflections

Well in many ways I have come a long way since a year ago, and even further since the year before that ... yes time has moved on but mentally and emotionally in so many ways I have too. This has not been an easy road, and I would not wish depression on any one. But with the love and support of my family, friends, doctor and therapist I have made significant steps up the mountain towards leading a normal life whilst having bipolar depression. Don't get me wrong, I have not conquered it completely and this does not mean I don't still have debilitatingly down days, but with medication and with strategies that I have developed at length with my therapist I am able to look at it objectively and take preemptive steps to try not to descend too far down the spiralling whirl pool of despair.


One of the things I tend to do which does not help me is isolate myself when feeling down. Whilst it is hard to socialise or try find the energy to engage when low, and often I feel I am exceedingly dull company and completely anti-social, hiding away and avoiding people is probably one of the worst things one could do. On some days when low, just getting out of bed in the morning is a mammoth task and one has to summon up a great deal of courage to do this. Finding something that I have to do and get up for everyday has become an important thing on my to-do list to try curb this and prevent slipping into an ocean of despair.

But onto more positive things ... Whilst I am still not completely back to where I once was career and life path-wise, I am buidling my contacts and doing some meaningful things. My passion for the protection of the environment has come to the fore and I am currently running with trying to fight against the destruction of the Mana Pools area in Zimbabwe, which is threatened with plans for mineral prospecting and large scale tourist resorts which could threaten this precious wilderness. I am also protesting against the development plans for a mall on a wetland area which is related to one of my primary interests which is wetland ecology. So am being kept busy which is good, as when I have too much time and no sense of purpose this can lead me downhill.

So guess what I am trying to say in this post is that, like the old adage, you don't climb a mountain in a day but with each day you slowly ascend to new levels, all the while seeing how far you have come and looking ahead with the challenge of what is still to come. However to not be defeated by what you still have to climb, but taking it one step at a time.