Totally didn’t know about Theresa May

Yesterday was a really good day. I saw my friend Suba at Victoria Station before I got on the bus to Oxford. Sarah who I am staying with had kindly left amazing Columbian filter coffee out and mince pies and biscuits (Cara if you’re reading this, I only ate one biscuit I promise). I then went via the post office where there was a really lovely assistant who went completely out of her way to help. The guy at the counter asked me where I was from and when I said Zimbabwe he said but weren’t there only Shona and Ndebele accents – er no! There’s a Rhodie one, a middle class white one and coloured and then a range of others. My friend Demelsa that I met later had said she was looking forward to hearing a familiar Zim accent. I had said well which one? I can try the various options.

I was treated to lunch with my friend Bronwyn at Christchurch College who is studying an MBA there. She gave me a grand tour of everything, including the library there (my favorite bit – it had a curly staircase and books going up the walls – so cool), places where Harry Potter was filmed and Einstein’s study where there was a poem he had written (who knew he wrote poetry?!) We went to other colleges and the Bodleian before having scones and tea at The Rose (amazing chai tea – very warming,  Yesterday was cold).

Demelsa met me outside M&S and we went to the Christmas market. Lovely things and very festive. She had said when it got cold her strategy is to retreat into a shop, so we went and perused Waterstones. We had such good laughs. She found a book called How to Pack Your Suitcase and said it might help me so I don’t have gunpowder in my bag next time – er, it was medication Demi! There was also a book that went into great depth on how to ride a bicycle that we thought was hilarious and Demi said well maybe if it isn’t your culture and you move to Oxford where it is, you may need this – but still. We had dinner at Liam’s which serves very healthy fast food. It was really yum. Demi then got some carob from Sainsbury’s and we had some with hot rice milk at her flat, also yum. Turns out she lives literally around the corner from Sarah in Headington and I must have walked past her flat hundreds of times before.

So to relate to my heading – I like totally missed the whole Theresa May vote thing yesterday – oooops. I haven’t really been online or following the news. I might have woken up this morning to her not being PM. My friend Sarah said well the UK is in crisis you know. Afraid I retorted well you still have food and fuel available unlike Zim, to which Sarah promptly replied – for now! I can legally get a prescription made out for me while I am here to stock up on my medication – I may need to get a cover letter though for travelling with “my explosives”. Apparently though medication here might run low because of BREXIT – not all a bowl of cherries here either.

An explosive story in Nairobi

Am sitting comfortably in my good friend Pippa's spare room in Steatham writing this. I did wonder if I was going to spend a couple of months or more in a Nairobi jail yesterday. After managing to get round not paying US$75 per kg for being 3kg overweight in Harare and leaving at 01:40 instead of 00:10 as it had said I actually arrived in Nairobi on time yesterday morning, a little sleep deprived. My whole trip has been proudly sponsored and supported by Kenyan coffee most of the way. I found a nice coffee shop in the airport and took my meds as normal before heading to the departure gate. I did note they had a security check point to go through but it wasn't in operation. They did however randomly pick people out to be searched and have swabs taken of the inside of your hand luggage and your hands and clothes. As I obviously look like a potential drug smuggler I was singled out and had to wait to be searched.

They literally emptied out the entire contents of my bag and got to work. Well ... they hadn't been at it long before the fancy looking chemical analysis machine starting going off. I started wracking my brains as to what could be triggering this but I was in no way prepared for them to say, "Madame, it appears you have explosives in your bag." Sorry, what??!! Instinctively I reached forward to try look in my bag but was told, "Do not touch the bag!" OK. Not having touched my bag, they then did swabs of my hands and to my alarm and consternation they announced these were covered in explosives too. They called for security back up at this point and I started wracking my brains as to what could possibly be explosive in my bag - panic. I could only think of an eau de cologne but it is not an aerosol. The new security person wanted to know if I had packed my bag myself - yes, and if I had at any point left my bag unattended - no!

I suddenly thought of my lithium tablets. Suggested these but was told no, lithium is not an explosive. But .... they had a look at what else I have in my medication vials and low and behold Venlorflaxin is! At this point I would like to thank my psychiatrist who wisely told me to photograph my prescription before I left Zim, which thank God I did! I had to switch on my phone and showed this to security and luckily it had a nice big stamp with my psychiatrist's name and qualification on it. I did begin to wonder though if they would confiscate my meds - do you know how hard they are to get in Zim at the moment and they cost me precious US dollars?? To my great relief though security filled out a form with all my details on and then said I could repack my bags and go wait for my flight. So there you have it - my story. I did not spend Christmas and next year in jail as a potential terrorist from Zimbabwe who uses her medication to blow up planes.

I managed to make my way from Heathrow to Streatham on the Underground and thanks to Pippa helping me get an Oyster card last time managed to get a bus. Did go the wrong way up Streatham High Street and rescheduled to see my cousin Carly today rather but now happily ensconced in chilly England. Off to watch A Very Very Very Dark Matter with Pippa tonight at the Bridge Theatre - it looks like it will be good and seeing Carly for tea this afternoon.

Fifty Shades of Gluts and I am done

We closed school yesterday, ending off with a prize giving. I had to suddenly translate the French club's skit as the main person in it had forgotten her words and only remembered them in English. Two of my grade seven students gave farewell speeches. The one was absolutely delighted to be asked to and had a speech already written before I asked. After having been one of the naughtier ones in the class he said he wishes we had a form 1 as he would come back next year if we did. I ruined the beginning of the holidays for one of the other teachers by saying that in four weeks we will be back at school. We used to get longer December holidays. Next year terms are all going to be 14 weeks long and we only get three week holidays - the person in the Ministry clearly never taught.

Managed to get most of my planning for next term done sitting in a five hour petrol queue. People kept asking me if I had gone and been given a number from the garage - by this point if I went to go and get one I would lose the place I was in. Luckily when I finally got to the pump it wasn't an issue - I would have been very bleak if it had been. Trying to eek out on the fuel I got and hopefully will last and take me to the airport on Sunday. Fuel is rather scarce.

I am excited about some things for going to England on Sunday night but I will miss the boyfriend and I will be honest I am not looking forward to the darker days and cold. But it will be good to see friends and family and maybe snow (fingers crossed - although that possibly will make it colder!)

Had my last personal training session for the year today and we did gluts and more gluts - who says you can't get a lower body work out without bending your knee (still seem to have a damaged meniscus). Going to get some things I can do while I am away to try keep fit and was told to watch what I eat - over Christmas is tricky but will try :P

Getting eaten by lions

Beginning to feel rather exhausted and there are still two weeks of school to go. We have a staff meeting just after we break up but will have to take a bit of lesson prep with me to England. I am really feeling the extra weeks of school as this term is longer than last because of elections. Tomorrow we are taking all the students to the Lion and Cheetah Park. There seemed to be a misunderstanding with the bus hire as when asked how long they thought it would take us to get there, they said six hours! I think I would go a teeny bit more bonkers if I had to sit on the bus with my class for that long. They were possibly confusing the Lion and Cheetah Park with Antelope Park in Gweru - I hope so! My student that I was happy to report to his mother had greatly improved in behaviour, decided to only take home the point that I had said to his mother he must behave tomorrow. He came to school on Monday and asked if I really thought he was going to be eaten by lions? That is not what I had said.

The last time I went to the Lion & Cheetah Park.

Am off to personal training in a minute. Trying to summon up some energy - am drinking a lot of coffee this week. Went to watch the new Fantastic Beasts film last night with friends, which was good, but finished late.

Dug out my winter coat from when I was in Switzerland yesterday and was pleased it still fits. This is after I went to a gift shop to get Christmas presents and the lady who knows me there said as it was going to be cold in England perhaps I could borrow things from my sister. She then looked sideways and said but my sister is much smaller than me ... perhaps I could borrow a scarf!!! Gee, thanks.

Running out of weekends

Suddenly realised I basically only have one weekend left in Harare before I go to England for Christmas. I will be going to Nyanga again the weekend of the 30th and then I leave on the 9th. Need to do Christmas shopping and get my winter kit sorted (I am a little out of practice with really cold weather and I need to see if my winter coat from Switzerland still fits me - fingers crossed). Regarding fitting into clothes, my personal trainer was discussing my diet with me on Thursday. She did say it's that staff tea of mine on Fridays 😝 But teachers need something to look forward to and have sugar on a Friday 😁 We really really do! Well, it was also the occasional Danish from Veldemeers - I told her about their new ones with cherries and she sat there and just said, "Yuuuuuuuum!" Yes, they are, they really are. But yes, they have to go too.

Finish my current short stint of house sitting today in Ballantyne Park. The five dogs were not in my good books this morning. The dogs next door seemed to be charging up and down the fence barking late last night (I don't know if Umhlanga the black cat had gone next door). My lot decided to tear up and down the corridor outside my room barking in response. When they finally settled they managed to get into the playroom of the little girl of the house and chewed a whole lot of her toys. To add insult to injury I was also greeted with lots of mounds of poo this morning. They are sweet dogs otherwise but five dogs is quite full on I am finding. Especially when trying to feed them.

Has been musical sitting in my school work crate with the dogs I'm looking after. They each want a turn.

Had a success story with one parent consultation yesterday, as their son's behaviour has drastically improved since last term. I really am pleased with him and it is rewarding that he has come such a long way and is really trying. I did have to say that I think he needs his self confidence built up and I said I was concerned that when he gets to high school next year he may give up too easily if he doesn't get things right the first time round. Another interesting thing from this week was that I gave my students as an argumentative essay topic "Should children have free access to the internet?" I was really surprised that the majority of my class felt they shouldn't and they gave good reasons such as that it kills their creativity as they don't have to think of ideas themselves, it uses up time that they could be doing other things and it exposes them to things they maybe shouldn't see. This even came from my one student who had said she didn't like tv as it didn't give you things as quickly as YouTube and you had to wait for programs to come on. I really wasn't expecting the response my kids gave and we had a debate on it after they wrote their essays and they felt very strongly about it.

Robotically built aeroplanes and sausage factories

I am pretty tired after a week of consultations with parents but tomorrow is Friday! One parent expected me to go and apply to high schools for their child next year - um, no that is not part of my job description, sorry. Other than that they have generally gone OK. My one naughty boy's mum wants me to do NILD rhythmic writing with her son from now until term ends in three weeks, to try improve his handwriting - her son is appalled but I have told him he and I have a date at break time for ten minutes every day.

Went for an MRI on my knee on Tuesday. When I first got there the technician came out and said they had a delay as the machine was overheating - eeeek. Luckily they got it sorted out but I had forgotten you have to go into a claustrophobia inducing tunnel and did start to feel a little closed in. Twenty minutes felt like an awfully long time to have to stay there and keep still. The outcome was that I don't have any tendon or ligament damage BUT ... I have a torn meniscus and it can take from a few weeks to SIX months to heal. I am not allowed to bend my knee, jump or run - goodbye to most of what I do for personal training. My personal trainer did arms and core today. At one point she asked me if something hurt my knee at all. I took a long time to reply and then said, "Ummmm, no I don't think so." She thought this very funny that I had to consider it so deeply.

Managed to fit in my Chinese six year old at lunchtime today. He went straight into drawing me an elaborate plan diagram of his plant for robots to build aeroplanes the size of space rockets. Apparently the robots were going to sit at computers and do this! From there he somehow jumped onto the topic of a sausage making machine and went into an impressive detailed overlay of how the sausages would be formed, packaged and "sugar coated"! He even had a brand name - "Taxi Supermarket Sausages". I had to ask what gave them that name ... well, according to my six year old you buy these special sausages from a supermarket that is a drive in deep freeze. You drive your car in and then can get out (you need a winter coat) and get your sausages and maybe make a snowman if you want to. So there you go! My friend Nina says maybe I have a future Nobel laureate in the making and I must make sure he remembers me when he is. I answered that he better be, to both.

Surviving

We started parent consultations this afternoon. My one dear, darling, delightful student for reasons only known to him, decided to tell his mother I was seeing her on Thursday - NO, I was supposed to see her first this afternoon and it now means I have to slot her in as a third consultation on Wednesday and will only go home at 4.30. He wondered why I wasn't enamoured with him the rest of the day and why I seemed grumpy. Hmm, I wonder why? The only parent I had this afternoon went fairly well but had to say her son needs to be assessed to see if he is on the autistic spectrum and no, an educational psychologist wasn't going to cut it. Saying that, I am doing an online course through the University of Kent on autism and I think I have a few of the characteristics to a degree. I definitely express myself better in writing than through oral communication and there are a few other things.

I finish where I am house sitting currently tomorrow and then go home for one night, before going to Ballantyne Park til Saturday or possibly Sunday. I will be taking on the biggest menagerie of animals I have looked after to date and one dog is special needs. The friend told me about an armed robbery last night in the area so I may be grateful for having five dogs on the alert. I have the choice of whether they share my room with me or not - we'll see!

Ventured to Arundel to get some Christmas prezzies and I must applaud Inside Out gift shop as they are the only people I know who have kept their prices the same with all the Zim madness. Guess where I will be doing most of my Christmas shopping. It's a clever move in a way, as it means people will still patronise them and probably buy more (well I don't know, but it does seem clever and I am not complaining at all). They had run out of BirdLife calendars though so I must try find those. From there I went to Pick'N'Pay and I was so excited to see olive oil I scooped up a bottle only to nearly drop it again when I checked the price - er, will make do for now with what I have. Hoarder tendencies are breaking through as you see things that you haven't for a bit and you think, I better get at least two!

Driving to pick my mum up from HIS there was a large cloud of smoke which looked suspiciously like it was from Pomona Dump. Really hope not!

Pomona Dump on fire in November 2016 (photo from John Culley)

Exams

This week has actually been rather laid back with my class writing exams - means I don't have multiple subjects of marking each day and having prepared the exam papers already there's no lesson prep - a breeze. Next week is going to be a little bit of a killer as I have parent consultations every afternoon and will have a full morning of teaching. Cracking on with reports as have to have them ready for Monday. My one naughty boy pulled out all stops and came first in mental. I think he surprised himself as he burst into tears and came and gave me a big hug (was a rather rewarding teacher moment I will cherish). My other rather mischievous boy got full marks for his comprehension and although didn't burst into tears, got quite emotional too. This morning they all finished before break and so I read them the Giraffe, the Pelly and Me and I had a captive audience. Word got out and one of the younger classes said at the end of the day they were waiting for me to read them a story.

Met up with a good friend for coffee after I taught my Chinese six year old online. (My six year old, who had drawn an elaborate treasure map to his house in China, is semi expecting me in China tomorrow to go find his hidden treasure - I had to explain it's not that easy to get to China at a day's notice, as much as I would love to). My friend who I had coffee with said good bye to me and then shouted across the coffee shop's car park, did I want weed?! She meant pond weed - oh dear! Last time I was at this particular coffee shop one of the students from school suddenly materialised. He is one of the boys who wants to attract aliens to the school playground. I have shown him the trailer for the documentary about the aliens that visited Ariel School. He wants to know what the students there did to attract aliens. His smelly cheese idea doesn't seem to be working.

It was my last, possibly ever, lesson with my form four and we tried to tackle some past paper questions on Macbeth and then an unseen poem. Have taught him for two and a half years now.

To My Mother

Most near, most dear, most loved and most far,
Under the window where I often found her
Sitting as huge as Asia, seismic with laughter,
Gin and chicken helpless in her Irish hand,
Irresistible as Rabelais, but most tender for
The lame dogs and hurt birds that surround her -
She is a procession no one can follow after
But be like a little dog following a brass band.

She will not glance up at the bomber, or condescend
To drop her gin and scuttle to a cellar,
But lean on the mahogany table like a mountain
Whom only faith can move, and so I send
O all my faith, and all my love to tell her
That she will move from mourning into morning. 

George Barker To ln more, cl

Fuel seems more available but things are still scarce in supermarkets. Making staff tea for school last Friday was a little challenging as there was no flour and the only oil was $29! Veldemeers had some croissants on special at $2 each so I got some of those, some meringues and used muffin mix to make brownies. Pick'N'Pay is cheaper but tends to have long queues whereas Spar and Food Lovers are more expensive but you don't have to queue for as long.

Halloween

Walked into my classroom this morning to be sprung upon by a group of my boys saying, "Boo!" and then, "Happy Halloween!" I was slightly preoccupied, so didn't get a huge fright. Got my class to write Halloween poems for creative writing. My one naughtier boy wrote in his plan "Aim: to give Ms Lannas nightmares." He wrote a good poem though. At lunchtime I switched on Zoom to have my six year old in China's mum asking me to wait a minute. He suddenly appeared in front of the camera decked out in a wizard's hat and proudly spun round to show me a cape with gold pumpkins on it. Guess everyone is celebrating Halloween today. Didn't know it extended as far as China but there you go.

I was quiz mistress at the Mustard Seed last night and did a heavily Halloween themed quiz. I think I made the first round on history in October a little too difficult in places. I had requests at the end to include questions on birds, sport and things like 1+1 next time if I do another quiz. OK.

Met up with a good friend this afternoon at Queen of Hearts who is back briefly from the UK, where she lives now. Was so good to see her and made me realise I have really missed her. Hopefully see her in Oxford in December.

I am on staff tea duty this week. It is going to be interesting getting ingredients tomorrow as not only does everything cost a bomb at the moment (some prices having more than doubled), it is also hard to find some things. Interesting times. One teacher at break today said it was good to compare where we shop and find things as we can find things more cheaply. Another teacher replied, "Is anything cheaper?" At least the fuel queues seem to have eased up slightly. Last week they were ridiculous. Life in Zimbabwe.