Runbo's Secretary

Yesterday and today were not great with Ira. We went back to him not looking at any of the words for reading and having to make a deal for him to colour in. Apparently he did get diagnosed by the psychiatrist I suggested as being autistic but his parents feel it was too quick a diagnosis and don't believe it. His parents and my supervisor are also not interested in him seeing a speech therapist. This does make my job hard. I am particularly struggling with reading and sounds. At times he can speak but at other times he clams up.

Runbo came running up to my car today when I arrived to say his puppy had been sent to a home as Runbo needs to go to China. He is beginning to get excited about going to China and seeing his mum. We read the big brother book and the one on Chinese New Year again and then Runbo put me to work. He had a whole lot of people he wanted to make cards for. He cut out different sized and shaped pieces of paper and I was instructed what to write and draw. He wanted a card to his nursery school teacher Pippa saying Pippa he must go to China. Then one to his best friend at nursery school called Mindi asking him to still play with him. There were happy new year cards for his mum, dad and granny and then I got a card. I was to write to myself "Thank you for teach me" (I tried to correct it to teaching) and draw a secret picture to myself. I told Runbo I am going to miss him while he's away and sweet boy, he immediately replied he was going to miss me too.

I gave Runbo the choice of what we're going to do for his last lesson tomorrow before he goes. We agreed on a picnic in a den with his dinosaurs. I have some dinosaur snap cards to play with him. I'll take some biscuits - his favourites are Oreos and then Wedgewood nougat ones. Yesterday and today I had some new Chinese sweets. I think some might be for new year. One was called a sugar coated haw which is like a toffee coated hawthorn with sesame seeds. Then I've had fulingjiabing which is a sort of agar jelly coated in rice paper. Today Runbo had what was like a crystallised carrot and I think mine was either pear or apple. At first I thought mine was ginger but it didn't have much taste. It would help if I could read Chinese.

Toffee coated hawthorns.

fuling jibing rice paper jelly cakes - traditionally for Chinese New Year

Five stars to Ira today

So pleased to say that today Ira outdid himself. He read some of his words (a first), he coloured in, enjoyed using the sand tray for writing AND he finally did his news picture for me and did it willingly. There were other moments where he was not such a happy camper and I had to resort back to bargaining. A friend of his from last year who is a year younger than him has come back to nursery school and is now Ira's playmate again. I can say doesn't Ira want to be able to go play with Jayden? If he does such and such and then this then he can go. It does work when he is crouched in the corner and won't budge. Definitely needed this as was beginning to lose heart as it felt like I was pushing an elephant uphill with one hand all the time. When I drove out at the end of the morning Ira leaned over the picket fence and said bye bye and he'd see me tomorrow.

I came home over lunch and looked up on how to do binding for a quilt. Found the video below and going to try finish the overdue baby shower quilt for my to-be-godson. Once I've finished the quilt my next project will be to try do a quiet book for another friend's baby girl.

Discovered Runbo is a little scared of dragons. Although I pointed out that the Gruffle in the Puddle Lane story I was reading him looks a bit like T. rex, Runbo said no T. rex doesn't breathe fire and Runbo doesn't like the idea of fire blowing. OK, will need to change to some different books. Runbo asked for more T. rex stories but I think we need to go with something different to increase his vocabulary. Runbo did like the book on Chinese New Year. We sort of made a Chinese lantern today but need a stapler as the glue we had wasn't very strong. Since we couldn't continue with it without the stapler Runbo asked me to draw different dinosaurs for him on pieces of card. The T. rex was for him and his daddy and then the pterodactyl was for his mum. I asked him if he was now a big brothersaurus but he said no, he's a T. rex. He said he could take his card dinosaurs to China on the aeroplane on Saturday but not his plastic ones. I quite fancy drawing Runbo sitting on an aeroplane with his various dinosaurs peaking round at him from different places like the overhead locker and seats behind. Will try work on this idea.

SaveSave

Runbo has a baby brother

Kicked off the morning with Ira today and it required a lot of patience and encouraging. Even to the point of putting the stumpy crayon in his hand and trying to get him to draw circles. Numbers wasn't so great with separating red from green objects into sets. It was mission to get him to draw the red set. For reading I'm not sure if anything went in as Ira wouldn't look at the new words. The most success was in the patterns work for writing. Tomorrow we'll be using a sand tray for practising writing.

I spoke to my supervisor and she's going to speak to Ira's parents about going to speech therapy clinics at Parirenyatwa and going to possibly get assessed for autism. To diagnose autism you seem to need to do a lot of observations.

Went from teaching to coffee with a friend and she introduced me to a cool website called Canva that you can use for graphic design. She also suggested trying to sell photos online. We talked about the ideas of postponing one's Christmas to when all the January sales are on and possibly going up Dombonshawa or Ngomokurira this weekend. The weekend of the 28th I've been invited to go to Hippo Pools which I'm looking forward to.

When I got to Runbo's this afternoon he ran up and grabbed my hand and said I must come see. His dad had set up a new generator as they had a power cut and don't usually have them. Runbo was ecstatic that this produced electricity. After we read the story on Chinese New Year Runbo announced he didn't feel like making a lantern today as I'd planned but we could make it tomorrow. Instead he went and got his dinosaurs and we had a long conversation about who was related to who. Through this Runbo told me he had a baby brother. I wasn't sure if it was true as he then said the name was a secret and it was his best friend. Turns out from his dad he does indeed now have a brother. I asked Runbo if he was excited to go on an aeroplane on Saturday and if he was going to take his dinosaurs with him. He looked at me and said he didn't think the aeroplane would allow him to bring them - oh! I told Runbo's dad that Runbo thought the new baby was the size of his little finger. Runbo chirped in, no he was the size of a peanut. I think Runbo is in for a surprise.

I saw my psychiatrist this afternoon and overall he thinks I'm doing well. He weighed me again though and has decided to decrease my olanzapine in an effort to try bring my weight down. Hopefully I won't become paranoid or overly anxious. He said though that if I do I can always up the dose again.

Hope

Hope
As elusive as a dandelion seed.
When you look at a field of dandelions
do you see dreams or weeds?
Try to grasp hold of it,
where will you keep it stored?
Will you keep it close
or will it simply be ignored?
Hope is everlasting
so close your eyes and make a wish.

Slow internet Sunday

Went to church this morning for the first time in ages. I have gone to help with kids' church but otherwise not really for over a year. Am grateful that friends from church have not brought it up when I've met them for coffee and have just been supportive. I don't think I would be able to go back if they had been judgemental and pressed me on why I wasn't going. One friend in particular really showed God's heart when she made the dress I wore to my sister's wedding. I had been having a dress made by an outreach project for women who have been abused in Epworth. Unfortunately the measurements didn't fit and the dress I was supposed to have didn't work out. This was the day before we left for England. My friend met me for coffee that day and said if the dress didn't work out to not hesitate in contacting her, she made me promise to. I did and she miraculously made a beautiful dress in just 3 hours that fitted perfectly. She offered it as a gift even though we'd used her fabric and time. It really helped me in going over to England as I was not wanting to at the time.

After church I managed to speak to three speech therapists. Apparently there is a clinic offered at Parirenyatwa Hospital every Monday. It might be useful for Ira to go to this. I have looked up what the symptoms of autism are and I am a bit concerned that he displays these. I will need to speak to my supervisor and his parents and see if we can get him tested. Hope he doesn't have it.

Watched the film of The Girl on the Train. I don't particularly like that it is set in the Hudson Valley instead of the line from Ashbury to Euston. For thrillers it is sometimes not so great to have read the book before watching the film as you know exactly what's going to happen if the film follows the plot. I've been watching youtube clips of Glee covers when the internet allows it and really wish there was a fun choir to join in Harare that does feel good music. At church I was asked to be in a dance group for a Variety Show to raise funds for the less privileged. I think it will be line dancing. A friend sent the link for a free online photography course through Harvard and I've started watching the lecture videos. Is similar so far to a photography online course I was given for Christmas but it is helpful to watch rather than just read the information.

Glee

Reconnected with some friends at church which was nice as I've been feeling a bit cut off from people. Have coffee dates with some friends this week in between teaching. One friend wants me to paint a picture on a sub-station building. I've got an appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. Hoping I won't have to wait too long as I have Runbo after.

Fun and Games

Today was challenging. Ira went all rigid when he was brought through the gate to me and I had to coax and cajole him into the classroom. Eventually he was persuaded to help me with his numbers exercise and he did manage to do the writing exercises but reading and sounds were near impossible. I am not sure if the sounds in particular are because of his speech impediment. In between to try and get him to focus I got him to run around and do some stretches. At one point though he rolled into a ball and rocked backwards and forwards shouting. Am going to try meet with a speech therapist next week to get some tips and am researching on ADHD and what I can do.

With Runbo this afternoon we spoke about his little brother who will be born at the beginning of February. When I said to Runbo was he going to share things with his little brother he gave me a quizzical look. I said how about his dinosaurs. He went hmm and then after deep consideration said maybe not. He then started doing a mental audit of all his toys and said the motorbike was definitely a no and only he could play with his puppy. To put Runbo's mind at ease I did say well his little brother wouldn't be big enough for a year. Runbo then said oh his brother was going to be the size of his finger. Trying not to laugh I showed him how big roughly he would be and Runbo seemed really surprised. Next week we'll look at a book on Chinese New Year and make lanterns and dragons before he goes back to China with his dad and granny for it and for the arrival of the new baby.

Glad it's the weekend. I will have to do some lesson prep for Ira and for my Israeli businessman's English lessons starting next week. Otherwise I am enjoying Wuthering Heights and having finished reading The Girl on the Train I've managed to get the film. Am disappointed that the film is set in America but interested to see how they portray the story. Having coffee in Borrowdale tomorrow morning with friends and a friend's new baby which will be nice.

The issue of being childless & slightly exhausted

Today's lessons with Ira went better in that he didn't cry or howl like he did yesterday but he wasn't paying attention so it was a song and dance routine with a bit of bargaining over when he finished something he would be allowed to go play. He enjoyed sorting things into groups for numbers and he threw himself into the environmental science part on water where he could pour water into different containers and see its properties. When he first came to our classroom he did try to run away which I had a hunch he might do after yesterday but after that there were no bolts for the gate like yesterday - phew. At the end though it didn't feel like I only started this yesterday. Felt like it had been at least a week of it already.

Runbo was much gentler with his puppy this afternoon and his dad asked for tips on having a puppy. We spent a good part of the lesson in the garden. Next week will be my last week with Runbo before he goes to China for a month for Chinese New Year and to be with his mum who is there and about to have a baby brother for Runbo. The magic suitcase did captivate both Ira and Runbo and was a success.

Am feeling a bit like I am not part of the group with friends who have babies. I don't mind being with friends little ones but when the talk all shifts to child birth and comparing notes on babies it can be isolating. Have had people say when am I going to have a baby as if it is as simple as planning a party. I would like children but after a friend's experience with depression, pregnancy and medication I am wary. I wouldn't be able to be on lithium and that could really affect my mental health and being on other drugs while pregnant is risky. There's then also the consideration that if I had a child, would I be well enough to look after it. One would hope to be in a relationship and have support and not doing it on my own but as the mother it is a huge strain if you are not well mentally and have a child dependent on you. The other thing is that I could pass on the genes which predispose one to depression.

To have a baby the obvious thing is to have a partner which so far isn't happening. Should that happen it is also the financial cost which is not to be taken lightly. It would not be fair to my Mum to fall pregnant and be a single parent.

So for the short term it doesn't look likely just yet. I just wish some friends could appreciate this.