I am crawling to the finish line of Friday. I haven't slept properly for the last three nights running as there is just too much on my mind and it is starting to tip me towards a very dangerous edge. I snapped at my class today and now the dear mother who sent me angry texts yesterday about her son getting "unacceptable" in his book, is taking her son's word against mine, and saying I am victimising him. She is supposed to see me tomorrow but has been calling me (I haven't answered) and sending even angrier texts. I am not looking forward to tomorrow and need to try get an early night tonight so I can just cope and make it to the weekend.
After a big blow up with my mum on Tuesday she has AT LAST got a date booked to see the specialist in Cape Town - she has to be there to see him on the 11th of March - Hallelujah! This has also really been stressing me out as she just was digging her heels and not wanting to go. I told her what a cousin had said - that if she has a bleed at school she will really traumatise the students - I know - I was traumatised by the last time and I am not an eleven year old.
At midnight last night I decided I needed to contact my therapist as I am just not doing well. She is out the country but she has said she can skype me today. I am also booked to go see my psychiatrist next week and we may need to review my medication again. I can't afford to not be on top of things.
Went to personal training today and my trainer's cousin took me again. She does usually push me a lot harder but I told her I have had very little sleep. She still made me do the work out and she said it wasn't strenuous - um, not sure about that. At the end she did breathing and grounding with me and that really helped.
OK I must finish exam papers by tomorrow and then skype Rona and then try, try very hard to sleep.
... just skyped Rona and it has helped me and given me stuff to work with to try confront things.
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