Being in Zim

I started reading the book "The Last Resort" last night. It kicks off with the farm invasions and murder of white farmers in 2000. Gosh that seems like a different life time ago and thinking back to the days of fuel shortages and lack of even the most basic commodities feels like we're talking about a different Zimbabwe to the one I am currently living in right now. Things have changed in many ways but I guess some of the underlying things are the same.

My writing group is starting again apparently so I have started a separate blog on life in Zim and coming home (http://wp.me/402gN if you're interested). I really would like to write more. I find it far easier to type away than I do to sit down and analyse statistics! Think I may have missed my calling somewhere along the line. There is a free online course from a university in Potsdam that I have signed up for on creative writing and story telling. I really would like to go into writing more and maybe try writing stories or, if I could try, a book maybe. We'll see. Feel a bit excited by the idea though and it is something that does appeal to me.

I would really like a more formal job that pays. I have been opting to go into school with my Mum as we have been having bad power outtages at home as the national electricity supplier ZESA keeps havign prolonged load shedding. This has been very frustrating and particularly bad again since elections. At school I work in the staff room. It does at least mean I see more people than I would sitting at home, but I do feel kind of spare part-ish and like I shouldn't really be here. I do at least sub from time to time at the school when needed so can semi-justify being here that way. The school does have lovely grounds and I love walking through them smelling the iceberg roses and observing the flambouyant peacocks fan their tails. I don't think I'd like teaching full time but if I had to, an international school would be what would appeal most. But being a teacher is not my first choice career wise as I feel I would very quickly feel like I was back at school too. Will see. If other work doesn't open up I may have to consider teaching full time as it is job security and a slightly better paid income.

I think part of my aversion to becoming a teacher is that teaching takes over my Mum's life. Earlier I said my Dad is a workaholic, well the same is true of my Mum. From early on we used to have to spend hours and hours waiting at school for my Mum and get home late as she would still be working and might have even stayed on working if it were not for the fact that security wanted to lock up. We used to have to go back to school with her even in the school holidays. Part of it was her never ending attempt to tidy up her classroom, but it was also often when she gave extra lessons to help towards paying the bills. School seemed to overrule our lives and still does. We seem to have always spent more time at school than at home. In a way it has felt like my Mum stays away from home to avoid having to deal with life issues there.